At enormous expense the Winners Certificates are in preperation.

Will you be lucky enough to be awarded with one of these masterpieces which undoubtedly are future collectors item?

Biggles

Anybody want to buy a dog?

Big Moose

''Loosers? Loosers? There are NO loosers. It's the taking part that counts. Everyones a winner!" Shouts Smithy whose seated in trap 2.

A voice pipes up from trap 1, "What utter politically correct poppycock is that" shouted Biggles, "It's that JoeMini to blame, it's always his fault" "Whatever the problem I say blame JoeMini"

The party moves to the hotel bar. Biggles burps, knocking over a table of good Australian Crown Lager as he staggers across the bar. Somehow manages to duck a haymaker swung by this 6ft 3inch Aussie sheepshearer. 

"Dear boy, chill, did I ever tell you about the time I ........................" Biggles headed towards the bar dragging the sheepsharer behind him.

The lights dim and a cheers goes up. It's cabaret time. "Gentleman, enough of this bl##dy PC claptrap, it's time to welcome to the stage "The King of Dilligaf  - Kevin"

Gee, you've never heard of Kev? Now he's a true honest to God fair dinkum Aussie, sport.

How much?